Friday, June 19, 2009

Waxing maudlin


When the babies were about six weeks old, we went to the Renaissance Festival. As I was holding my babies and attempting to walk six feet without being stopped (and I admit two babies held by one mama is worthy of stopping someone) I bumped into a family with twins. She looked at me and the babies and said (first words) "Don't worry, they will grow and it will get better." Then she went on to tell me how "horrible" the first year is.

Grow? Better? Easier?

Now I will be the first to say that it would most likely be a lot more difficult if these were my first babies. I have tried and failed at ways of parenting with my other children, so hopefully they will be the only ones to suffer the brunt of therapy...and I am very happy with where we are as a parenting unit. I say this today of course...ask me again tomorrow!

Anyway, I see many many posts about how hard it is, how simple "twin" things are overwhelming. Two babies in a bath, one goes this way and one goes that. One gets into this thing while the other gets into that. Pretty normal twinage type stuff.

I embrace that. Embrace it so completely.

I know that I will miss that terribly when it is gone. I can't hardly even think about it. I tell the babies all of the time to STOP GROWING!! I can't think about the fact they are almost one. I hate it. There are so many amazing things in every little thing that they do. I LOVE that when one starts to try to climb the stairs, the other has just peed all over the floor. I might complain about it...but I have noticed that I still leave my babies naked every day. I love a naked baby more than I care about the pee.

I don't know. They are going to go off in two directions and we are going to feel torn in two directions. I can see that tear as something that needs to be patched up...or I can fill it with the joy that they bring me.

I don't mean to say that I don't have days. I do.

I have times where if they don't stop touching me/nursing me/climbing all over me, I'm going to scream. Those usually come after hard nights. But I can count those nights on one hand and I am pretty good about not carrying that on for more then one day.

I have had so many people say "I make it look easy", or "I set the bar so high"...but really, it IS easy. They are the most awesome, fantastic, funny, amazing babies that I have ever known (standard not including my others) and it is a privilege to get to be in their lives.

Mama's of twins...we have to do it either way. Why not do it with complete surrender to the entire experience and overwhelmingness of it all?

What an amazing trip.

3 comments:

  1. As a new mom of 6 week old preemie twins thank you for this post. It's a great reminder to embrace it all even though I'm completely overwhelmed.

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  2. Holy cow, are you MY twin!?!? I feel this exact same way about my babies. Maybe it's because we were already experienced mothers? Or these babies are MY last so I'm really just enjoying it as much as possible. I totally JUST posted a blog entry about how much fun we're having and how much I'm enjoying this new stage of their life. I don't think it's all that hard and in fact it's easier than it was to have one 13 month old and already be 5 months pregnant with the next (or the next TWO).

    I totally get it!

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  3. Twins are FUN! I never (EVER) would have thought so, but I too appreciate every day with them as babies...and I do find that most days they are in fact easier than my first. I love (LOVE) little naked twins...I mean, what's better than a naked baby, other than 2 naked babies!!

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